Some bands just don’t deserve reviews. Some bands are so horribly cliched, generic and downright shit (here’s to you, Anemic) they don’t deserve people to know about them. The Abner are one of those bands. ‘Chinoiserie Lounge’ is just garbage, there’s no other way of looking at it. In an attempt to sound like some kind of Blood Brothers/At The Drive In hybrid, they’ve got the usual stuttered guitar licks and scattered drums, but ultimately this is horribly predictable.
What annoys me about some of these bands is that their attempts at being ‘arty’ just end up sounding ridiculous. Song titles that are long, pretentious and seeingly completely devoid of meaning are littered throughout this record. I mean what the Hell does ‘Our Resident Harpist Will Entertain You’ mean? And I know other bands do the same thing, but at least sometimes these are remotely smile-inducing. I’m just sick and tired of bands doing the same old cliched things. Bands like Refused and At The Drive In were pioneers of a new musical genre. They twisted nu-metal and hardcore and gave it their own unique tint. Almost a decade on, bands shouldn’t be allowed to shamelessly rip-off these bands. Being an influence is fine, attempting to change the world with yet more Faith No More bizarreness is not cool.