I first saw this band in the Scunthorpe Rock Open, that esteemed competition for bands in North Lincolnshire, either last year or the year before. I can’t remember which. I was judging I think, again I can’t remember. Most of you won’t know that the standard at the Scunny Open is, quite frankly, appalling. And the vast majority of the time the bands that do impress aren’t mainstream enough for the judges (I wasn’t a regular judge, I filled in one week, just before anyone thinks I am to blame!) I mean The Next Autumn Soundtrack played there a couple of years back and my jaw hit the floor. But their arty take on old Deep Elm-esque emo was way too much for the inbreds to take and they didn’t make it through. Six Second Hero turned up looking like they had come straight out of So-Cal – all mesh caps, scruffy, long haircuts and arses hanging out of jeans. They looked like a pop-punk band, and so it was no surprise when they played like one too.
But when I say ‘played like one’, I actually mean mimmicked. Because SSH were, frankly, awful. While they looked just like Fallout Starting Glory, and certainly had more energy on stage than a small power station, their sound was more comparable to the buzzing of said power station. the Black Eyed Peas once sang “where is the love?” That night I would have asked the band “where are the songs?” Bland power chord riffs over a backdrop of whiney out of tune vocals are something I have absolutely no time for. Yep, you can play the part, prowl the stage like you own it and star-jump off speaker stacks to your hearts content, but if you can’t actually play – what’s the point?
I asked the very same question when listening to this EP. Once again, it looks nice. The accompanying press pack was very well presented, with bios, pictures and lots of time and effort put into it. On that note, a big thumbs up. The accompanying press quotes are rather worrying mind you, basically suggesting these guys have more potential than all of the Yank pop-core bands put together. Well let me tell you straight kiddos – you don’t.
The world does not need another pop-punk band. It’s a genre as over-saturated as the emo bracket; a label of music which is now being marketed at kiddies what with Busted, McFly and whatever else is cool this week being peddled at pre-teens worldwide. Blink 182 and Good Charlotte are now bona fide POP acts, so if you’re going to play the pop-punk ball game at least either have more melodies than you could dream of, or more punk than, erm, something that requires a lot of punk. This record has neither – it’s a wishy-washy attempt which sadly re-captures their live show – all front and no substance. The first two tracks are instantly forgettable; sure it’s ‘nice’, but it’s also bland with a lack of a memorable chorus. One thing I will give the band credit for is their attempt at re-creating some half-decent harmonies and the layered vocals work quite well throughout. But then neither vocal is particularly distinguishable and the lead vocal isn’t strong enough. Put some feeling into it boy!
I’ve been harsh and I make no bones about it. If Six Second Hero plan to last longer than their name suggests they desperately need to get their own identity and attempt to be different. And if they don’t want to be different, at least stand out from the pack and make an impact. Watered down crap like this won’t impress anyone – regardless of what the inevitable friends and family backlash below will probably say…
Paul