Is this a joke? is someone winding me up? People actually listen to this shit? Actually, more seriously, there’s some A&R guy or gal somewhere who actually thought this was good?
No wonder the music industry is fucked.
Apparently this joke of a band feature Never Shout Never vocalist Christopher Drew so I can only assume whichever lucky label is releasing this has done so to cynically cash in on this man’s popularity, ‘cos he sure has hell isn’t talented. All this record is, is a bunch of kids growling and screaming over badly constructed, de-tuned riffs yelling about pizza (xPizzax), vampires (xVampiresx) and taking the piss out of “bands who cash in on the breakdown” (xDestroyx). I’m sure it’s supposed to be ‘ironic’ and funny, but it’s about as ironic and funny as the lyrics in that Alanis Morrissette song all those years ago. Which, if you’re too young to remember, were not even ironic or funny. Kids should be fucking ashamed of themselves for listening to this.
I’ve spent too long writing about this album, I’m ashamed of myself. Here’s a quote for you: “This album is fucking balls. I’d rather stab myself in the eye with a rusty pen than listen to this horseshit ever again.”